The Iranians can stop protesting...I have finally decided to post again! With the "King of Pop" kicking the proverbial bucket this week (some reports say from our good friend in the pharmacy world - the opioid narcotic, Demerol), the self-proclaimed "King of Expressing How Very Soul-Sucking and Bursting-Little-Capillaries-In-My-Head-Inducing Working in a Pharmacy Happens to Be" felt I should rattle off some details of oddities from the month hiatus.
Umbrella-Woman:
So, I am at the drive-through (it's "through" not "thru" - don't be lazy). An older lady with no neck (you know - one of those head-directly-on-the-sternum types) pulls up and tells me her name. GOOD FOR YOU, WHAT DO YOU WANT? She says her prescription is ready. I look it up. NOPE! I finally locate her script in the section where we put drugs that need to be ordered. GREAT, SHE'S GOING TO EAT ME WHEN SHE FINDS OUT WE DON'T HAVE HER DRUGS. I inform her that we are ordering her drug and she can get it tomorrow after 4pm, or I can call another store and see if they have it. Her ginormous eyes well up and she says she is going out of town, cannot wait, and needs her drug so she won't (drum roll please...) "pee on herself". ON THE INSIDE I HAVE ALREADY PASSED OUT FROM LAUGHING TOO MUCH AND BREATHING TOO LITTLE! I notice that it was ordered 2 days ago and should be in already, so I go look for it. I find it, and tell her I will fill her Rx right away. There is a beaming smile from no-neck lady. I run it through her insurance and get a rejection. AWESOME! I call the insurance to find out what is wrong. They tell me she has to order by mail.
Then, it happens...
She presses the button to make that annoying automated man scream that there is a drive-through! A colleague (who has foolishly decided to work for CVS as soon as she gets her license) goes to open the door. I stop her and tell her that since the lady has now pissed me off, she has to wait until I am ready for her.
It gets worse...
Next I hear this freaking mastodon banging on the window with one of those tiny, compact umbrellas. First thing that comes to mind is, "who in the hell thinks an umbrella with a 7-inch diameter is going to protect them from the rain?" Then, in a blind fury, I whip open the window. Her eyes got so wide I thought they were just going to keep expanding and completely engulf her entire head. I tell her mockingly, "Thanks for being so patient. I ran it through your insurance, and they are not going to pay for it." She goes into this rambling tirade about "how dare you not give me my prescription"...blah, blah, blah... (I start daydreaming about her giant body rolling over her poor SUV...) I tell her that all I was trying to convey to her was that her insurance was not going to pay for it. I tell her she is free to pay out-of-pocket or take her Rx elsewhere. She yells that she will pay for it. I inform her of the price, and she starts yelling that she didn't want a full month supply, only enough for a week until her mail-order arrives. I WILL STAB YOU WITH A PEN! I told her that was fine, and that all she had to do was to tell me that was her intention all along. I DO NOT KNOW YOUR WHOLE STORY UNLESS YOU TELL ME SEA-COW!!! She says that I didn't ask! I re-run her prescription for a week supply, and send her on her way while the bearded pharmacist laughs in spite of me.
Moral of this story - incontinence makes people (neck or no neck) extremely irritable. This is yet another example of why I can't wait to get through school and get a real job. Even if I must deal with the same people as a doctor, at least I will be making a substantial amount more and have a license to kill anyone who pisses me off too much.
Until next time...
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